Hello and welcome back!
I wanted to continue the talk today about ineffective habits, explaining why these habits may be difficult to change. Hopefully, you have been succeeding with last weeks assignment, but if not, I will add some more encouragement. If your good, I’ll see you next week. I took on last weeks assignment myself, because I grasp the idea; what we teach we most need to learn. I certainly had something in my life I wanted to change. At the end I’ll tell you if I did …
We all have something in our lives that doesn’t work, support or benefit us. I could get into the details on how an unwanted habit started, but I realized it isn’t necessary. Plus I want to focus on where we are and where we want to go versus why it began or where it originated, as it serves no purpose. You know where you are, you know where you want to go, so now decide how you will get there.
Thinking back to successful changes I’ve created in my life I recognized I couldn’t do it and worry about it at the same time. I needed to remain focused on what was working and what felt right. As you search for ways to change you may find a system, idea, or plan that may have parts that work and parts that don’t. It is up to you to figure out what is best for you. You may pick and choose between several different plans to come up with one specific system for you. Like an eye doctor, ask yourself, “which is better, this one or this one?”
Here’s a simple example; A friend, after the birth of her child, wanted to record all her child’s milestones, but kept forgetting & instead scattered notes throughout the house. She couldn’t quite make it a habit to retrieve the baby book, record according to the books suggestions. She was afraid she’d miss out on something special for her baby. We found a solution that worked, we installed a calendar in her bathroom to record her child’s first year. Plus others could jot down something to the child as well.
If you truly want relief from a habit, or remove one entirely, or change it to benefit you, you have to keep at it. You get to where you want to be by being persistent, taking consistent steps toward what you do want, if you feel your way toward the prize you will be the victor. If you expect to win you will.
I tried to quit smoking 3 times before I was successful. The first time, when I found out I was pregnant, I quit cold turkey. Once the baby was born I began smoking again. The second time someone made a promise to me if I quit smoking. I quit and a year later the reward wore off and I began again. The third and final time my doctor asked me if I would consider quitting. When she asked me it felt right. So, I promised I would quit before my next visit, a year later. This time I prepared and expected a successful outcome. I researched all the different ways to quit, from the gum to meditation. I interviewed people who had been successful at quitting and I recalled all the things that worked in the two years I had been smoke free. After deciding I would use a product (the patch) to help me I picked a date, it was six months after my appointment. I acknowledged my biggest worry, which was I may gain weight, but instead of dwelling on the fear I quickly came up with a plan, again recalling past accomplishments, and put it in place right away, before I quit. I stayed focused on everything that felt good, on what was working, and on May 5, 2013 I celebrated my eleventh year anniversary being smoke free! And the challenge I took on last week changed today!
You can have any habit from losing your keys to continuously running late or needing to shop less, whatever it is if you follow these step you can accomplish anything too!
1. You can’t do it and worry about it at the same time. Decide to release worry.
2. Recall earlier accomplishments and what worked for you in the past.
3. As you are determining your plan to change what doesn’t work feel your way to your sweet spot. If something doesn’t feel right it may not be for you, tweak or adjust it or try something else.
4. Be consistent. Continually checking in with how you are doing and celebrate every step!
You got this!