1. Mind your mind. Thoughts are harmless. That is, until you believe them. We are conclusion minded, so we decide the meaning behind all sorts of things whether they hurt us or not, whether they are true or not. If we are negative minded about the world & everyone in it our conclusions will manifest, more likely than not, a story or explanation to support our negative outlook. If we retain a positive outlook our conclusions will lean more toward the bright side. If we don’t communicate or investigate what the truth is we have no way of knowing, yet we hang onto stories that don’t benefit or enhance us & maybe even hurt relationships. We tell ourselves awful stories & spin terrible tales that are negative & mostly untrue. Even if we find out the truth we react as if our imagination is more true & remain upset. The discomfort or feeling that someone or something scared us is enough to hold onto the negativity our mind created. Our feelings are created not by our circumstances or people, but by believing our thoughts about the people & circumstances. These thoughts become obsessive & habitual & can dis-empower us keeping us stuck in negativity. The key to break free is to observe your thoughts. What do you think about all day? What do you tell yourself? Once you learn to mind your mind you will realize all your discomfort, misery as well as joy is due to your thoughts. For instance; one week it is hot & dry & no rain is predicted. When it finally arrives you are ecstatic & thankful for the rain. Another time you have an outdoor event & the rain comes & now you feel terrible about the rain. In reality the rain is just rain it was your thoughts that caused you to feel one way or another not the rain.
2. Feel what you feel. When an uncomfortable feeling lurks about we tend to look outside ourselves to comfort us. Anything from complaining to over indulging in unhealthy activities. We haven’t been taught how to cope when we feel stress or discomfort. The important thing is to feel what you feel & then reward yourself with something soothing that doesn’t cause more stress. When something or someone triggers an upsetting feeling to emerge, instead of resisting it or say no to your feelings allow it the space it needs. Negative feelings are trapped inside of you because they’ve not been allowed to be processed. Don’t react, take a deep breath & ask yourself if you can let it go. Sometimes the answer will be ‘yes’ & other times it won’t, as long as you know where you stand with your emotions the clearer you will be with who you are.
3. The next step, once you’ve mastered your thoughts & have learned how to feel your feelings, is peace. Having peace as your main priority will change your life. Whatever causes you distress, stop it, or at least lessen your time, attention & focus to it. Allow yourself to relinquish control over others & events. Learn to rejuvenate your fun side & find what brings you peace.
4. Freedom over identity. Going back to #1 your thoughts. When you identify with your thoughts as though they are who you are it will cause more distress. Let’s just agree each one of us is enough right where we are, you have been perfectly placed right where you are. Honestly, if you believed you were perfect, complete & beautiful (which you are) what would you finally let go of? Perhaps an old conditioned thought pattern that you weren’t good enough. Good. Stop identifying yourself with all that made up stuff you’ve created due to your past experiences. You are fine, everything will be okay, I promise.
5. Laughter is the best medicine & it looks great on everyone. Make it a practice to laugh throughout your day. Laughter & tears produce the same results; release. Wouldn’t you rather be laughing? Good, me too!
I wish you all peace! ~Sandy